Why do we NEED to be thin?

               I don't get it, when was it that a paradigm shift happened in time that led to society ( especially in the fashion industry) to crave thin-ness? I am nineteen years old and my entire life I have dealt with other people criticizing my weight and the way that I look. Yet whenever I talk to people especially now they give me the same old bullshit you are beautiful the way that you are. Well guess what I don't want to be beautiful the "way that I am" I just want to be beautiful goddammit. I'm sick of society making it that, god forbid you are a size bigger than a 2 you are absolutely repulsive and should basically pick up the nearest snuggie you can find and hide in it until the day you die. When did this all happen? I know I'm young but seriously why is it that we all seem to look down upon people that are "heavy"? I can't even say that I don't do it myself, because I do. In my mind "fat" people are repulsive, gross, unmotivated, underachieving slobs. Why the hell do I think that? Do I know each of these people? Do I know what they are doing with their life? What they have achieved? What difference they are making in the world? Hell no! So how dare I make such rash assumptions about the people around me. Most if not almost all of these thoughts stem from my own personal grievances about the way I believe that other people perceive me. When I was in middle school I was picked on mercilessly by the other kids in my grade. This traumatized me and I nearly always came home and sobbed for hours. This teasing didn't stop there either it continued into high school as well. However the teasing and criticizing was not only coming from my peers but also from my family, teachers, doctors, etc... I couldn't catch a break. Once this "stopped" ( at least from my peers directly) I continued the vicious cycle within myself. I developed an eating disorder that stopped me in my tracks and nearly derailed everything. I dove into a deep depression that I still struggle with every day. The words that were shouted at me from every angle were internalized and although I'm not trying to blame other people for my disease, I sincerely do not believe that I would have developed such a condition if not for the harmful words that I grew up with. Sticks and stones  may break my bones but words will never hurt me? I think not.